day 10, the source of all things

my sister and i laugh at our parallel lives sometimes-

we both have spouses who are on the road a good percentage of the time, and we both find ourselves in the position of having to run a household for days, weeks, sometimes months, on our own. (we've been over this, i know.)

it feels natural to both of us, somehow, that this would end up being the case.

it was, so you see, how we were raised.

my dad didn't leave on work trips for weeks on end like the menfolk my sister and i both chose...

but he took leave of us, mentally at least, about 20 years before he took leave of us physically.

everything was left up to mom.

running the house, keeping us sane, paying the bills...

never mind the full time job of care-taking the one person on earth you had fully expected would take care of you.

mom often talks about wishing dad was around to take care of stuff. (which makes debbie and i laugh, because for most of our lives she, uncomplainingly, ALWAYS took care of EVERYTHING.)

for her sake, i wish that she had him to take care of stuff.

for all of our sakes, i wish we all had him to take care of stuff.

but we don't, and that is what it is.

but what do we have?

what we DO have is

we have mom. the rock of Gibraltar.

who, though she didn't ask for it and no one would wish it on her,

brought up two girls while flying solo.

who, though we, her girls, might not ask for it,

we run a mighty tight ship, flying solo.

we sew a straight seam, literally and figuratively,

we relish back-breaking labor and steep rocky mountain trails.

we lebeck girls,

who love when the menfolk can join in,



but we sure as hell aren't waiting around for them.




HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my mom.

deep gratitude for passing along her fierce independence.

though it felt forced on you, mommy, i kind of think it's deeper in your bones than you'll ever realize.